Can you imagine a forest in which the lions have been chased out by a hunter? Imagine a kingdom whose king saunters to and fro his kingdom; imagine a man who sleeps under the bridge but visits his four-storeyed, ultra-modern duplex in Ikoyi Lagos once in a while. Strange, incongruous, unreasonable, foolish; yes, you find a name for it, but that is the sad reality of Katangites such as the floor representative of the B1 floor — Aikhore Emmanuel.

One may wonder why such a topic has been chosen, in that he or she may feel that using the lion makes some Katangaites far more important. Far be it: all Katangites are equal, but according to that famous George Orwellian aphorism, all animals are equal but some animals are more equal than the others. Having established that fact, let’s get back to the matter.

Out of curiosity stemming from the fact my floor rep was absent at a council sitting I attended, I stumbled upon him and engaged him in a discourse. Over the next few minutes, I would be frozen to my pants. Abomination! He explained to me how he had not got accommodation, or rather, how the negligence of certain people had cost him his accommodation— whichever way you decide to see it. The gentleman now comes from Ojoo to see the goings-on on his floor; he now pays cab and motorcycle operators to attend sittings. Even when he attends sittings, where does this man sleep? Well, I thought Aikhore was alone on this until I approached Kanyinsola Olorunnisola, the Editor-in-Chief of Indy Press and foremost campus journalist, for permission to write this piece. Another shock, it was deja vu for Mr. Kanyinsola! Make no mistake: Olorunnisola isn’t a floor rep. He, just like hundreds of other Katangites, have been robbed of bed spaces they had paid for and were fully eligible to grab.

Mr. Olorunnisola last year paid the fixed sum of fourteen thousand naira for accommodation. Elated as he may have been, the gentleman went to the room he was allocated to, only for him to find out that his bedspace had been earlier allocated to somebody somehow somewhere. He complained and was told to write letters to correct the gaffe. Mr. Olorunnisola practically wrote to everybody writeable and till the next time you will read this piece, he hasn’t gotten his money back.

Mr. Aikhore on the other hand paid the same amount of money as Mr. Olorunnisola and by right, he is entitled to a box room. Owing to the fact that the only box room in the B1 constituency is occupied by the cleaners, he decided to go for the room to its right— B14. He also went in joyfully to claim his bed space but lo! His bed space had been given out. According to him, several complaints to both the Administrator-in-General and the Speaker of the Legislative house; letters to whosoever wherever and frequent visits to the porters’ lodge have all been met with closed eyes and deaf ears.

Aikhore is a 200-level student and has—or may have—political aspirations. His absence on his floor already counts as a disadvantage to whatsoever campaign plans he might have for his aspirations. When his BCs and campaign posters might be out, the freshers might begin to question: “Who is this Aikhore of a guy?” Of course, who is Aikhore will come because Aikhore was not living in the hall when you gained admission into the university. Besides that, a lot of B1 floor members do not know who their floor rep is. Unfortunate? Yes. His fault? No. The gentleman tries his best to visit the floor everyday from Ojoo, whereas a sizeable number of the floor members will feel that their floor rep doesn’t have their interests at heart. Who pays the young man back? Heaven knows. Well, the gods are to blame this time around; not your rep.

The ultimate height of the representation a floor rep has to offer is when he presents matters of his constituents to the Legislative House. When a man does not stay in a place, how is he expected to bring their grievances to bare? Well, another question that the gods must answer.

As a matter of truth, these gentlemen’s monies could be returned by the gods, since giving them the bedspaces now will be the most preposterous venture ever.

In the end, everybody is a loser. The floor rep whose political career stalls; the floor members whose interests are not well protected; Katangites who lose what rightfully belongs to them; the leaders who do not serve Katangites well because the floor rep does not know his floor members’ problem; but in all of these, one set of people— who deserve all the blame— are absolved of it because of their authority: they are the gods.